from the outside looking in

I keep a running list of things I am going to buy, mostly at The Kingdom of Target, when we go back to visit the US next June. Yesterday when I was at the grocery store, I started thinking about things they have here, but not in the US. So here's my imagined reaction of a Chilean who is visiting the US for the first time, and what they will put on their list of things to buy at HiperLider.

Why do I have to get out of my car to pump gas? And wash my own windshield? I guess you can find places that have full service, but they cost more, and they are sometimes hard to find. In fact, where are the people at intersections on the street who will wash my windshield for whatever money I give them? And why isn't anyone standing on the street selling water, or sodas? What if you get thirsty? You have to get out of your car, or find a place with a drive-thru, like AutoMac (or AutoKing)? There is also no one selling ice cream at the bus stops, or strawberries, asparagus, or brussel sprouts. And when I sit at the red lights, there's no entertainment. In Santiago, people juggle, dance, and even eat fire, for as much or little money as I want to give. You can also buy a newspaper while waiting for the light to turn green, as well as a cell phone charger, toys, gum, and candy.

And while we're on the subject of being in your car, why do people drive so slowly here? Do they have no place to go? They wait around for an invitation to change lanes, too. Dios mio, people, push your way over and step on it! I won't even go into the lack of available cabs and buses. They may be crowded in Santiago, but at least they are everywhere.

Everyone here talks about how great the soda (pop) is, but I'm not convinced it's that great. Dr. Pepper has twenty different flavors, but that means you cannot taste any one of them! Where's the Bilz, the Pap, and the Coke Light (Diet Coke is so not the same thing). Where are the great little cookies that come in gold wrappers near the checkout? Where is the Quatro, and the water con gas? The bread here is horrible! All they have are packages of bread; where are the giant bins with very fresh bread? They have a few pieces of that here, but it's not that fresh. And there are two kinds, instead of twenty or thirty. And the fish-it's a disgrace. Why can't I go to the supermarket, pick out a whole fish, and have them fillet it perfectly for me to cook? And when I ask to have the head, they look at me like I am crazy.

They have one, maybe two kinds of pisco, and it's very expensive. And there are no pre-mixed bottles of Pisco Sours. The wine is pretty good in some places, but you can't get a good bottle for $2 or $3 like you can "back home." And why is the milk in the refrigerator? It's going to last only a few days like that. Why don't they have heat-treated milk in cartons that lasts for weeks? I don't want to go buy milk every 2 days!

Some things seem the same, but they're just not. The deli meat is not as fresh. The produce is good when it's in season, but it's very expensive. I miss chirimollas, and nisperos, and the different, very hot peppers that I can't find here.

Shopping in general is different. At the malls in Santiago, you can do everything-pay bills, mail letters, get your pants hemmed, buy clothes, and most malls are next to a grocery store, and even a Sodimac (like Home Depot). So I could get everything done with one stop. But here I have to wander all over to find the right stores.

Ah, but I guess there are things nice about his strange place. People here don't appreciate soccer, but they do care a lot about sports. The odd sauces that they put on meats are actually pretty tasty, and you can usually find a lot of different kinds of restaurants. The restaurants don't close in the middle of the day, so if I want to eat lunch late or early, I can. And even though most Americans can't make empanadas, or mix a decent pisco sour, they are generally friendly, and willing to talk endlessly about just about anything.

And, of course, there is Target here.